Reflections

I've been trying to analyze why I suck so much lately and here's a few things I've noticed about my game.

1. I suck so hard preflop
I'm a preflop pussy. I'd never raise anything but Pocket Jacks and up, and would fold anything else to an average preflop raise by someone else. Yes, I'd fold AK to a preflop raise of 3 or times the blinds, all in the name of "trying to lessen my variance", which I've always thought was a good thing. This is also why I always used to play the 6max tables instead of FR, my reasoning being that in 6max I don't need to raise since with less players the need for preflop raising is less as well. What an idiot I am.

As for lessening my variance, that's a big mistake to begin with. I read something about this on 2+2 which hit me pretty hard. It states The best players don't try to avoid or lessen their variance. the best players simply don't even care about the variance." If you're playing correctly like you should, variance is just what it is, a short term spike in luck. Over the long run variance disappears anyway and your true results will be evident, which makes worrying about it stupid and worthless.

2. Repeat after me: Bankroll, bankroll, bankroll...
Of course, I need to actually be able to reach the long term first. That means having a bankroll that can withstand the variance. I, in my everlasting intelligence, decided to start playing 25NL with a bankroll of around only $250. With just 10 buy-ins, I had to play carefully and avoid too much gambling. This also relates to my 1st point where I was trying to avoid variance. And as any knowledgeable player will tell you, if you're playing with scared money you might as well give it all up right now and stop wasting time, you're going to lose it all eventually anyway.

3. Short stacks should only happen in tournaments
With my bankroll not large enough for the stakes I was playing, I had to make things worse by starting to buy-in short. I resorted to hit and run tactics, I bought in for $7 or $8 at 25NL, looked to double up, then moved to a different table, rinse, and repeat.

Short stacking is bad for a variety of reasons. First, I was negating my advantage and playing to my disadvantage. I've already said I suck at preflop poker, but it didn't bother me too much before because I think I'm above average postflop. Postflop, I know can generally make the right decisions, even get away from a big hand if I sense I'm beat. With shorstacking, I'm looking to gamble preflop to double up quickly or bust, so my advantages were reduced to nil.

Also, as a shortstack I can't put too much pressure on my opponents, my bets have no leverage whatsoever. I noticed that when I play for the max buy-in, I prefer to have shortstacks opponents instead of other big stacks. I find it easier to make decisions against them, plus there's a certain satisfaction that comes with busting someone. Knowing all this I still tried to play a shortstack for a significant amount of time. What. The. Fuck.

I'm trying to correct all 3 above, but it will take some time. I've dropped back to 10NL, now always starting with a full buy-in, and raising and calling preflop more. Last night I made it a rule where if I'm the first one in the pot, I'm raising it if I decide to play. No more open limping, if at all possible. Of course I'll have to refine that again and again, but it's a good start. It's a long, very hard road from where I am right now to where I want to be.

Getting More Fishy as Time Goes By

Ok, so I'm playing really bad, and I'm on a downswing. Admittedly it's more of the former, but they're a really bad combination to be in. Last night I lost 2 buy-ins playing 10NL at UB. In the first one I open raised to 3xBB from middle position with AJ offsuit, everyone folds to the BB who min-raises, and I call. We both have somewhere around $8-$9. Flop came AJ5 rainbow, BB checks, I bet 2/3 the pot and he calls. Turn comes a 10, he checks again. I bet half the pot and he min-reraises. Feeling commited I move all in and he shows me KQ for the straight. Dammit.

2nd time, I get 44 middle position and limp along with almost everyone else. Flop is a beauty with 10-8-4 rainbow. BB raises pot, I reraise him 2.5 times his bet, and he moves all in. I call and he shows KK. Turn? K. River? K. Dammit.

A couple of things to note. I'm trying to bonus whore and moved most of the bankroll to Ultimate Bet to take advantage of rakeback and the 111% first deposit bonus. After I claim this I plan to keep on moving my bankroll around to claim as many bonuses as I can. Of course, the flaw in this plan is that I need to avoid busting and and at least break even playing the tables for the bonuses to make any difference. With the way I've been playing the last few weeks, it's starting to come into doubt.

I've also moved back down to 10NL. I just simply had my ass handed back to me in pieces when I tried 25NL. I lost $100 in the 2 weeks, cutting my bankroll almost in half when combined with the $50 I cashed out. I'll have to rebuild at 10NL for the meantime before I try moving up again, and next time I'm going to do it right.

To make matters worse, I've lost another 2k playing at the Metro. I'm just playing so bad it's getting embarrassing. I'm starting to think that the players' eyes light up when I sit at the tables as they think I'm going to be "easy money", and I can't blame them. Sigh.

I read somewhere that until you've reached a point where you really, really, really hate this game, well, you just haven't played enough poker. I'm starting to reach that point now. Ah well, hope I can snap out of this.